Breastaurants, teeteries, breastaurant industry growth, breastaurant successs
(Part Deux)
Never go back to the scene of the crime, they always say. But here you are again, requesting some more Dr. Mr. Mancandy down-low on the nation's best breastaurants. Then again, I must admit that I myself am a repeat offender - you can find me chowing down and looking up in one of these fine eateries any day of the week.
And so, not wanting to keep you from your breasts any longer (be them chicken or otherwise), I've done you all the service of compiling a second h...
Breastaurants, teeteries, breastaurant industry growth, breastaurant successs
I won’t deny it – despite my biceps-and-brawn persona, I’ve got just as much of a soft spot for friendly ladies as the next guy. Throw some ice-cold brews in there and a hamburger, and hell, I’ll come running from miles away. Luckily for us dudes, well-endowed eateries are bursting through the seams of cities everywhere. Of course, while we’re all familiar with the industry pioneers, I’d be doing you all a disservice if I didn’t let leak some of ...
Tastefully crafted by Miss Beehaven on August 8th, 2012
Breastarants, Teeteries, Hot Waiters, Pectaurants, Hooters for women, man candy, abs of steel, Magic Mike, Male Strippers, Female Review, Bachelorette parties
I have a secret to share my darlings….I’m a little, shall we say, bored with breastaurants. Now before you light your torches and head for my castle, let me just say I’m not and never will say “ta ta” to the tantalizing world of ta-tas, and of course I simply adore my wild and wonderful Boobzie girls and their impressive collection of double digit talent; but, I must say I’m a tad bit bored of knockers and knockwurst.
Are your ears starting to burn ...
So I’m sitting in my favorite bar the other day, having just tipped back a few of my signature Bullwhips, when I overhear someone bad-mouthing what I think is one of the best business models on the market today. No, I don’t mean the two-for-the-price-of-one breast implant deals they’re offering now in SoCal, though I do find that to be a bit of marketing genius if I do say so myself. I’m referring, of course, to the newest restaurant phenomenon that’s taking...
Ladies: I, Miss Beehaven, am here to share with you a little secret, there is no such thing as 'not in the mood'!
Darlings you know that I am always a fierce promoter of a woman’s right to do anything a man can do but better and in higher heels, of course. Although the question still remains, why would a woman want to do the sort of things some men are doing? Honey, please, that gorgeous gal Mother Nature gave us two big (if you’re lucky) reasons for men to beg to d...
Start up a Spring Fling with our Boobzie girls today! Buy any 4 Boobzie Girls, get a 5th Mystery Girl for FREE! http://t.co/3oqbrcUHVw
May 24, 2013 12:58pm 11 hours ago
Give a man a beer, waste an hour. Teach a man to brew, and waste a lifetime!
-Bill Owen
Apr 10, 2013 5:37pm 44 days ago
“@ftrophywifey: @Boobzie are amazing. Check them out!!” CHEERS!
Mar 27, 2013 3:46pm 58 days ago
Miss Beehaven
Born: After Madonna and before Lady Gaga
Birthplace: Barneys; Shoe Department; Manhattan
Occupation: Dream Maker (or Destroyer) of Boobzie girls
Born with a silver stiletto in her mouth, Miss Beehaven lives by one rule: If you can’t do it in heels with a low-cut top, it’s not worth doing.
Bucking tradition, she vowed to be known only by her last name; pronouncing first name-only celebrities "last season."
Miss Beehaven’s influence over all things bust-related is well documented: Her signature silhouette is a cultural phenomenon, providing inspiration for the infamous truck mud flaps, the emergence of "breastaurants", sharing with Victoria her secret and, of course, breathing life into the entire Boobzie brand. Having a penchant for effervescent adult bevvies, she can say “Bring me more champagne” in 32 different languages and it’s been rumored her bewitching ways played muse to a number of famous brew masters. It’s been said it was she who single-handedly inspired some of the most prized beers in the world and – perhaps rather unsurprisingly -- sparked the concept behind beer champagne. As a self-proclaimed citizen of the universe, she doesn’t involve herself in local politics, but she has made it a point to date (and dump) the most eligible bachelors from every country in the world.
Not content to merely make her mark as the bust that launched a thousand bottle tops, Miss Beehaven declared herself the Most Fabulous Woman in the World and set her sights on universal domination by establishing an agency filled with beautiful girls and their prized assets.
These days you can find her in sunny California, surrounded by more goddesses than Charlie Sheen. As the reigning queen of the Boobzie girls, she puts the B in boss, bee-otch, and Boobzie. When she isn’t juggling her jet-set schedule, she’s scouting for the next beautiful Boobzie babe. Who knows? It could be you.
Birthplace: Details are sketchy, but his birth certificate reads "Surrounded by women"
Occupation: Self-Made Millionaire, EVP Boobzie Internal Affairs, (self-appointed) Director of Quality Control and (un)official representative of all things "manly"
Always one for mixing work and play, Dr. Mr. ManCandy was hired-on by the self-proclaimed “Most Fabulous Woman in the World”, Miss Beehaven to (play) doctor to the growing Boobzie entourage. Ambitious from the start, he helped craft Boobzie from the ground-up with his own two hands and a little help from what fits in them. A man of uncanny good looks and unrivaled style, the world’s high class dating scene was a field Dr. Mr. ManCandy had no trouble breaking into (or breaking, perhaps, judging from the hearts in turmoil he leaves in his wake).
Self-reported recipient of an MD in what he calls "Lady-Science", and a PhD in "Player", Doc MC splits his time between (man)handling the Boobzie empire, hitting the classiest bars and clubs around, and, of course, spending quality hours with his choice Boobzie girls. Despite his flirtatious ways and soft spot for the exotic – beer, women, cars, travel, food and cocktails -- Dr. Mr. ManCandy helps run the Boobzie business with a steady gaze and a steady hand, if not a steady relationship.
Rumors encircle the Doc and his business associate, Miss Beehaven, but they both earnestly claim the extensive number of times they’ve been spotted together around the globe was strictly limited to Boobzie-related business. For unknown reasons this defense has failed to stop the media from speculating about the possibility of the two sharing more than stocks.
Still a mogul of all things busty, Dr. Mr. ManCandy is normally easy to find – just glance around for the smoothest-looking guy in the bar. Or, easier yet, just pick out the bust that has captivated the entire room – Dr. Mr. ManCandy won’t be far behind.
